Day 69 in Zambia
Okay, so I guess I’m not technically in Zambia anymore. I’m somewhere over the north-east region of Africa (I think), on my way to Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. It feels like I was just making this journey (although in reverse). The past ten weeks have flown by so quickly and at the same time, I feel like I have been in Zambia for such a long time that it feels very strange to be leaving. I wonder if maybe I’m comfortable in discomfort – that feeling of never quite having your bearings… never staying in one place long enough to develop roots… all for the sake of the next grand adventure. But, I admit, I can get used to nice cushy leather airplane seats (I like to be selectively comfortable, I guess… hehe). Actually this flight has turned out really nicely. And to think it could have gone horribly wrong. I arrived at the Lusaka International Airport a good two and a half hours before my flight, and used every minute. With all the luggage I’m carrying, I had to check an extra bag. I looked up the cost ($17 USD per kilo) on the Ethiopian Airlines website and noted that it said I could pay by credit card. So I arrive at the airport and have to ask an employee where to go for each step of the checking-in process. I get so lost in that darn airport. Luckily Zambian culture encourages interaction with strangers because there aren’t very good signs to guide from the taxi to the first security check-point to the international flight ticket counters. Once my luggage and I were scanned (and I got an extra pat down by a very friendly woman who joked with me about my inability to learn to tie my chitenge correctly even after 10 weeks in Zambia), I headed to the long queue to check-in and get my boarding pass. After entertaining myself by making faces with the small child looking back at me over her mother’s shoulder, I finally made it to the front of the line. I got my boarding pass and checked in my luggage and was then directed to see a man standing at the back of the line (where I started) to see about paying for a getting a receipt for my extra luggage. Realizing that the woman at the ticket counter never mentioned the cost of my extra bag, I made sure to ask as I was leaving. $150 she tells me. What!?! So I see the man at the back of the line. He and I agreed that the website “mislead” me because instead of being charged per kilo for my (very small and light) bag, I would be charged per piece at this MUCH higher rate than I anticipated. Additionally, they have NO credit card machine at the airport, so it would have to be in cash. “But, I don’t have $150 in cash”, I explain. “Can you get the rest from a friend?”, he asks. Umm… no. I don’t have a “friend” just hanging out in the Lusaka Airport with $30 USD to give me (almost a full month’s salary for a FORGE employee in Meheba). So he tells me he will talk to his supervisor and to take a seat and wait. So I wait… for over an hour. After seeing the same man walk by a couple times… and even ask me if I had been able to “raise the money” yet, I start getting worried because my plane is scheduled to board… like… now. So I find the man again and ask if the supervisor is coming because I don’t want to miss my plane. And he just says (looking at me as if I was crazy for have waited this long anyway), “oh.. go ahead” and waves me over to immigration. What!?! Sometimes I both love and hate the inefficiency with which this country operates. Apparently if you just wait it out – serving a one hour sentence in a plastic chair, people-watching at the airport – you can earn your additional bag’s flight to Rome. Nice! $150 that I can now spend in Italy. And then, just to sweeten the deal, I get on the plane and am shocked and amazed that, instead of the tiny, cramped seats of the rickety old plane I arrived in Lusaka on, I was boarding a plane with such spacious and comfortable black leather seats that it took me a beat to realize that I wasn’t looking at the business class section, but the economy section that I would be allowed to sit in. It’s the simple things that can really make life feel luxurious… ahhhh…
Afterword:
An American in Africa
Life in Meheba: A Practical Guide
Disclaimer: while much of this may apply to many countries in Africa, some may be specific to Zambia or the refugee population in Meheba. Much of this is also written “tongue in cheek” and is meant to be humorous as well as helpful. Do not take me too seriously or be too offended.
- Learn the appropriate greetings and response in several languages (people appreciate even if you can speak only a few words of their language… it also comes in handy at police checkpoints and encounters with security guards)
- Learn how to eat nshima properly (with your hands, ball up the nshima and eat with the meat/sauce provided with the meal). It’s fun to surprise Africans when a white person acts like a proper African.
- Always carry spare talk time… you will always run out when you need it the most.
- Some useful vocabulary:
o Mzungu (in Swahili) and chindele (in Luvale) both mean white person. Get used to hearing this shouted every time you walk by someone. Do not be alarmed if they also laugh or shout things out at you… they are being friendly, but you probably look pretty ridiculous and are doing something stupid… don’t take it personally.
o Africans have a very different sense of time. Do not expect things to be done quickly and learn the various forms of “now”. “Now” = possibly sometime in the future, but maybe not at all. “Just now” = later or sometime in the near future. “Now now” = actually now. Don’t be surprised if people are hours late to meetings and appointments, but be sure that you are on time. If you are late, the person you are meeting is sure to be on time and will leave because you weren’t there.
o “I’m coming” = may actually mean “I’m going”
o He and she are totally interchangeable. Don’t expect these terms to correspond with the gender of the person being talked about.
- Have a cat. They eat mice, bugs and lizards (even bats if your cat is really badass). They are also useful when you’re having a bad day and need someone to call names (better yet, name them something like chindele, eway, or fatass and you can affectionately insult the furry little buggers). Warning: keep all food secure if you don’t want them to eat it (and they will knock lids off of pots and climb on surprisingly high counters to get to it) and keep your windows closed unless you want to wake up to a cat in bed with you. To discourage begging for food and general annoyances, kick them or toss them (they land on their feet so don’t feel too bad). Also, be sure that you deworm them every so often.
- Don’t pet the dogs. This is probably good advice in any country, especially in the third world.
- Learn to make a fire on the braizier. For fun, hide the firestarter from new people and watch them do it the hard way.
- Don’t expect anything to make sense. Don’t get upset when things are totally illogical. Learn to laugh about it and just go along with the “Zambian logic”. I’m sure it makes sense to Zambians… there must be something wrong with us Americans if we don’t get it.
- Don’t piss of the government, police, guards, or anyone with an AK47. It’s best to avoid jail, fines, and deportation. Before travelling, you should probably learn the laws of the country you are going too, including traffic laws.
- If living in the bush, make friends who don’t. Use them for good food, showers, and lots of fun with other ex-pats.
- Take Malarone to prevent malaria. Also, Moziless is the best bug spray. It works and smells good. J Also, be sure to have antihistamine cream to keep from itching.
- Experiment with different things to do with rice, beans, and tomatoes. Have lots of condiments on hand to spice things up (Nanos Wild Herb Peri Peri is the hands-down BEST). Try to eat a variety of foods so you get proper nutrition (avoid living off of nshima as it has almost no nutritional value).
- Wear sunscreen. Even if you are a white South African you are still WHITE. You will burn in the sun.
- Even if you are unemployed, dirt poor, or in tens of thousands of dollars of debt from student loans, people will think you are a rich, white American. They will ask you for a lot of things (refrain from feeling guilty if you don’t or can’t give it to them) just to see if you will do it. They will probably laugh if you tell them that you are unemployed and they actually make more than you do.
- Pack light. Talk to someone who lives where you are going to find out what you actually need to bring and what you can buy there. If you can, have things made. Things from a woodcarver or seamstress you meet can be useful while you are there, or make great gifts to bring home and helps support a hard-working entrepreneur.
- Items I brought that have come in handy: pocketknife, ipod, camera, laptop, scarf (pashmina), watch, sunglasses, baseball cap, first aid kit, sewing kit, extra batteries, USD, lotion with sunscreen, nail polish (it’s nice to feel like a girl every once in a while), antihistamine cream, chocolate chips, chewable Pepto Bismol, running shoes, sarong/chitenge/kanga, quick dry underwear (Ex Officio), nice jacket/windbreaker, clothes with moisture-wicking material, universal plug converter thingy for adapting to all the different types of electrical outlets in the world, reading material (a Nook or Kindle is handy), headlamp, business cards with contact info, journal, pens and stationary, nail file, pumice stone, reusable shopping bag that folds into a little pack, a duffle bag that folds up small for extra luggage space as needed…
- If you want to stay on a houseboat on Lake Kariba (borders Zambia and Zimbabwe) stay on the boat called This Is It docked at Marineland.
- If you are in Solwezi, Yummilicious has better bread than Shoprite. Food at the Golf Club is really good and affordable.
- When driving, watch out for potholes (most of the roads are shit) and police checkpoints (just make sure you stop so they can check that you paid your road tax.
- Do not buy a Land Rover. Buy Land Cruisers because Toyota parts are easy to come by. Land Rover parts are nearly impossible to get. If you want to be really cool, outfit your Land Cruiser with a CB radio, nice sound system, rooftop tent, and freezer/refrigerator in the back. Yes, I have a friend with a truck like this and it is AWESOME.
- Be adventurous. Make friends. Try new things. Do not be afraid to make a fool of yourself trying new languages or dancing like a nut.
- The only appropriate response to the question “How are you?” is “Fine”. If small children say “How are you” it will most likely sound like one word and even if they respond “fine” when you ask them how they are, do not assume they will understand you if you say anything else in English. When greeting people, it is appropriate to find out how they are, where they are coming from, where they are going to, etc. Take the time to stop and greet people properly.
- Do not be offended if people comment on your weight (whether you are large or small, gained or lost) or if they say you look tired. Africans are just observant and will point out the facts. They are not judging you, so get over yourself and your American sensitivity. Any negative judgments are probably your own internalized prejudices and it’s probably healthy for you to work through your insecurities anyway.
- Do not be alarmed if it sounds like small children are being maimed outside your window… it’s just the stupid goats.
- Animals are dumb and they will run right across the road in front of vehicles and bicycles. The question “Why did the chicken cross the road?” becomes an existential one… “WHY did the chicken cross the road? WHY!?!” Just swerve, brake, and pray that you don’t end up with a chicken stuck in your wheel spokes. If you do, pay the owner, bring it home, and cook it for dinner (you probably need some protein to go with your rice anyway).
- If you are from the Southwest, learn to make tortillas and make sure you have Mexican spice in the pantry. You will miss Mexican food, but it is easy to make yourself.
- Milo is WAAAAY better than chocolate milk (it’s chocolate malt and it’s delicious). Try it hot or cold or in a milkshake… yummm…
- Brewed coffee is a million times better than instant. Buy a French press. Do not break it (if you do, blame it on the intern… if you are the intern, you had to screw something up eventually).
- If you want to get any work done hire a housekeeper (also known as a “houselady” or “house manager” depending on which end of the scale of political correctness you are on). It takes all day to make beans and do laundry. Your housekeeper will become your favorite person… treat her well.
- It is possible to stay clean in the bush (despite what your city friends might think). Bathe daily and buy a pumice stone for your feet. Your awesome housekeeper will keep your clothes clean and boil you some water for bathing, so this is another reason why she will be your favorite person.
- Make sure to iron all clothes that have been dried on the line (or wait at least three days to wear them). Mango flies like to lay their eggs in damp clothing and you REALLY don’t want the larvae burrowing into your skin. The heat from the iron will kill the eggs.
- Ground nuts do not taste the same as peanuts. They are still pretty good, and best if roasted, but NOT peanuts. (Addendum: I now believe that roasted groundnuts are superior to peanuts… but I may have just forgotten what peanuts taste like)
- If you are going to travel to Africa, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE be sure to learn how to hand wash your own clothing before you go. Honestly, it’s just embarrassing that all my Zambian friends are shocked that I know how to do my own laundry, since every other American they’ve met cannot put soap and water in a bucket and scrub their clothes).
- Try not to end up with an accidental Zambian boyfriend. Zambian men are flirtatious and apparently only joking 99% of the time. That 1% of the time you think they’re joking and they aren’t can be a little bit complicated. Coming home with a Zambian boyfriend on purpose is a whole different story (I have no problem with this). This is important because even if you didn’t know you had a Zambian boyfriend, he will still get jealous and butt-hurt if you talk to other men (which is generally the clue that you ended up with an accidental boyfriend). So complicated….
- Men can be surprisingly good personal shoppers. When shopkeepers see a person who looks a little lost and like they might have money wandering around a cramped market, they will hunt down EXACTLY what you are looking for – even if they have to search the whole market and bring you 10 different things to look at – just to make a sale. Once you’ve found what you wanted they will continue to find you 20 other versions of the same thing (t-shirts, shoes… whatever could remotely fall into the category of what you were searching for earlier) because if you wanted one pair of sandals, then you must want five pairs of sandals. Take that coveted item you were looking for and beat it, quickly… before the shopping trip starts to build momentum and you create a frenzy of people all over the market bringing you yet another pair of black shoes.
Reading list from my summer in Zambia:
Purple Hibiscus by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie
A coming of age story about a young girl from a wealthy Nigerian family. It is the story of a family lead by an abusive, ultra-religious patriarch, and a country in a time of political instability.
Human Cargo by Caroline Moorehead
A documentary of the refugee experience all over the world. It is an account of Moorehead’s personal interviews and travels across the globe – a re-telling of personal stories of refugees.
The Road to Hell: The Ravaging Effects of Foreign Aid and International Charity by Michael Maren
A discussion of the negative effects of development and relief work. A personal account and reflections on the author’s first-hand experience in the field of humanitarian assistance.
Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris
A witty memoir. I had to read something light to balance out the emotional intensity of my other selections.
The Shack by William P. Young
A fictional account of one man’s encounter with the Trinity. An interesting illustration of the relationship between God, the Holy Spirit, Jesus, and mankind. A story that makes the spiritual personal… a story of an authentic relationship with God.
Demon in The Freezer by Richard Preston
A great read for infectious disease nerds. A story of infectious disease research, government labs, and bioterrorism.
Where There Is No Doctor published by the Hesperian Foundation
An inclusive instruction manual for village health. A guide for health in rural areas of the developing world.
Nutrition: Concepts and Controversies by Frances Sienkiewicz Sizer and Eleanor Noss Whitney
A university-level nutrition textbook. Necessary reading as I was updating our nutrition curriculum.
The Bible
Self-explanatory. Not that I read the WHOLE thing, but bits and pieces (including the books of Daniel and Hosea and Psalm 105 especially). I even read parts of the New Testament in French to help in my language studies. J
Sarah’s Key by Tatiana de Rosnay
Two stories intertwined. One of a ten year old Jewish girl in France during the Nazi occupation. The other, the story of an American journalist living in modern-day France who stumbles upon a family secret that links her to this young girl from many years ago.
The Best Women’s Travel Writing 2009 edited by Lucy McCauley
and
The Best Women’s Travel Writing 2010 edited by Stephania Elizondo Griest
Short stories of women’s travels all over the world. Accounts of personal experiences of women who have gone out into the world with a bold and adventurous spirit.
The Blue Sweater by Jaqueline Novogratz
A personal memoir of one woman’s journey of personal discovery and global influence through international development work in microfinance. The story of the maturing of a young idealist whose vision could not be squashed.
Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriele Garcia Marquez
An excellent piece of literature about the reunion of a woman with her suitor from fifty years before after the death of her husband.
Hot, Flat, and Crowded by Thomas L. Friedman
An absolute must-read. Seriously… everyone (American or not) needs to read this book. The author describes the global crisis that we are at the cusp of and how America can redeem itself (its prosperity, its global reputation and leadership, and make up for the mistakes of the last 30 years of arrogance and complacency) by once again becoming a nation of innovators and leaders in solving world problems. Oh how I wish every person I met in Zambia that exclaimed “America! It’s such a wonderful country. It’s such a great place…” would read this book and understand my frustrations with my homeland and why this crazy American doesn’t want to stay put in the “greatest nation in the world”.
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